Connection is built one strand at a time.
Even a single thread can start a rope worth holding on to.
Image credit: Steve Bidmead
Hello fellow Enablers,
This morning started with a small modern crisis.
I had an 8:30am Aquilae Academy session—one of our monthly international virtual meetings with a trusted group of senior leaders—and no internet. Not just at home, but across the whole village. The kind of outage that pushes everyone onto mobile networks… and brings those crashing down too.
I was scrambling, trying to tether, toggle, patch something together. In the end, I ran the whole session from my phone.
Fortunately, this particular Academy team has been together for years. The emotional bandwidth is strong, and the technical hiccup didn’t derail us. That, in itself, says a lot about the power of connection.
And as it happened, today’s session turned out to be about connection in more ways than one.
Several participants shared challenges around integrating new colleagues from recently acquired businesses. Different teams, different regions, but the same underlying theme: how do we build relationships with people we don’t yet know—especially when working remotely or across cultures?
One of the foundations of the Academy is connection. We invest time in it intentionally, because strong, trusting relationships create the conditions for honest sharing, support, and growth. And today, as we talked through the challenges of bringing new people into established teams, I was reminded of a metaphor I’ve often found useful.
I like to think of the connections between people as being like ropes.
And ropes, as you know, are made up of many strands.
When we first meet someone, there’s often just one strand.
We notice something small we have in common—we support the same football team, drink the same coffee, went to the same school, started on the same day.
That’s all it takes to begin.
Then, over time, we add more strands.
Shared experiences, joint projects, deeper conversations.
Sometimes we find new strands, other times we create them together.
Those single strands, gradually woven, become something strong enough to rely on.
So my reflection today is this:
If you want to build connection with someone you don’t yet know—how can you find that first strand?
And if you want to strengthen an existing relationship—how can you uncover or create more strands?
It might be as simple as sharing an article they’d find interesting.
Or taking time to ask a question that shows you’re paying attention.
Or finding ways to work on something together.
This isn’t just about being nice. It’s about enabling performance.
In the Fulfilling Performance framework, one of the four Diagnostic Questions is:
How is the behaviour of the people around you (at home as well as at work) supporting you to perform at a high level?
It matters.
Connection is not soft. It’s strategic.
In Gallup’s global survey—referenced in last week’s post—one of the statements they ask employees to respond to is:
“I have a best friend at work.”
It turns out that having a trusted connection at work correlates strongly with performance and engagement.
So yes, we all want to feel seen, supported, and safe. But more than that:
We perform better when we’re connected.
If we want Fulfilling Performance—for ourselves and those we lead and care about—then investing in connection is time well spent.
One strand at a time.
Take your next step towards Fulfilling Performance
I’m planning to run a virtual session soon to share how the Fulfilling Performance framework can help drive engagement—starting with ourselves and extending to those we lead and care about.
If that sounds valuable and you’d like to be notified when I schedule it, just let me know and I’ll add you to the list.
CAREER-VIEW MIRROR #224
Side Mirror with Kay Korsh: Being Yourself and Looking the Part
How much thought do you give to what you’re communicating when you’re speaking?
Now… how much thought do you give to what you’re communicating before you’ve said a single word?
In this Side Mirror episode, I’m joined by professional stylist Kay Korsh, who’s spent 20 years helping celebrities, luxury brands, and business leaders make sure their style is working for them — not against them.
I’ve always been aware that how we show up matters — but to be honest, it’s often felt like an unwanted additional hassle rather than something to enjoy. This conversation with Kay helped me see it differently.
We explore:
✅ Why smart casual is harder than it looks
✅ How to simplify wardrobe decisions and reduce daily friction
✅ The silent messages your clothing may be sending
✅ How personal style supports Fulfilling Performance
If you’re showing up as a leader, building trust with clients, or representing your brand — this is one to tune into.
📞 Kay offers a free 20-minute call to discuss your style goals — details in the show notes.
🎧 Listen now: Apple Podcasts / Online / Spotify
Check out the directory of all our guests and episodes on Instagram.
“Go to people” need people to go to!
The Aquilae Academy: Guided peer mentoring and coaching for executives, senior leaders and business owners.
Running a business or holding a senior position in an organisation can be very rewarding. At the same time it can be challenging and even lonely.
There are certain topics we are either unable or uncomfortable to discuss with colleagues no matter how self aware and open we are.Sometimes it is just not appropriate to discuss an issue with a colleague. Maybe they are the issue!
Our partners and friends may want to listen and help but they may not have relevant experience or be completely independent.
The Aquilae Academy is for senior leaders and business owners who:
acknowledge that they can’t and don’t have to do it alone
value interdependence and
are looking to continue learning and growing with the support of a team of like minded peers
If this sounds like you, contact me and I’ll happily tell you more.
Thank you,
Andy
E: andy@aquilae.co.uk